Pressure

Keep it together.

People are counting on me. I can’t afford to fall apart.

So many people at work need my attention. So many projects to approve and finish. The workers need their pay. They have families to care for. I have to keep the company afloat. Will we turn a profit this year? We’ve been struggling so far to finish anything…

No, no, no. I have to stay positive. We will make it through. I’ll see to it. But how do I start…?

I also have to pick up the kids later. The older one’s struggling with her grades; the younger one hasn’t been himself lately. What happened? Why won’t they talk to me? Have my job commitments been pushing them away? I thought I had this balanced. This amount of time for work; that amount of time for family. Roughly half and half. Why won’t they speak up?

What should I say? Are the basic questions enough? Will they open up to me? Why can’t I remember the last time the kids talked to me? It couldn’t have been that long ago. No, it couldn’t. Right?

The company’s still floating; I can find time to help the workers; I can find time to help my kids. How, though? What am I even doing?

No, don’t think like that. Keep it together. I can’t fall apart.

If I take the deal with the other company, what will happen to my current employees? How many will get laid off? How many will I keep? What will happen to me? The other CEO seems reasonable enough, but will he ditch me, too, once he has my company? Everyone needs their paychecks, even me. We can’t all go unemployed now! Not when so many of us have kids. Some are single parents, even. But the company has to stay alive somehow…

Goodness, what’s wrong with me? Answers always used to come so easily to me. Why not now? I could use answers now. Make Project A priority one, and then… then what? What should come next?

Keep it together. I have to tackle everything soon. I can’t just stay in the restroom stall, crying to myself.

When I’m home with the kids tonight, I’ll have a nice chat with them as always. How many hours am I working tonight? Wait, do I have another overtime shift? Will I have to work until seven again? Oh, please say no, please…

But my workers may need the help.

My kids need help, too.

Someone help me. I can’t do this all myself. But who do I turn to? What do I do?

Keep it together.

Keep it together.

Keep it together…

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